The Best Worst First Date

          October has always had a special place in my heart. Growing up in NC, it is when the fall colors burst forth and it is time to pull out boots and sweaters, but it's not unpleasantly cold yet. October also happens to be when I met Garett for the first time.

          In a week it will have been 6 years since we met, and I just realized I have never written out our story and oh boy, I think it's a fun one.

          A little background to start: I was beginning my 3rd semester of college and was having the classic "I'm not dating right now, go work on myself" revelation that so many have before meeting their future partner. Dating was exhausting and I needed to get better at cooking, so I was just focusing on me.

          Garett was fresh off his church mission in Zimbabwe and on the opposite end of things. Him and his roommate had decided to try to go on (I swear the number changes every time he tells the story) at least 1 date a week. Though from what I heard from my roommate at the time, it was quite a bit more than that. He got off the plane from Africa, saw his family for a few days and then headed out to Idaho to start college.

          Because he had started the semester late, he was only taking one night class a week plus some online classes. In terms of dating, this made the pool rather small. He had church and this one class and that was all.

          Eventually he asked out my roommate Nikki. I need to note that I was the only roommate not home when when he picked her up, so he never saw me, and he still had some quirks from his mission. In Zimbabwe it was respectful to always face the person you were talking to and to clasp your hands together in front of you as a sign of respect. This wouldn't normally be so apparent, but I'm pretty sure they went bowling on their date. He brought her back and that is when I saw him. I think I was sitting on the floor and their farewell was brief so once again he didn't see me, but boy I noticed him.

          The next day her and I were talking about her date. She wasn't interested in pursuing anything and neither was he. I vividly remember that I was folding laundry at the time and I jokingly told her she should send him my way. After all you can't waste an attractive returned missionary. She asked if I wanted her to and I said sure, being certain that absolutely nothing would come of it. Time went on, a week passed and she asked if he had reached out and I said no. (Another side note, she didn't give him my last name, so he had no clue what I looked like or anything about me, so for all he knew I was some crazy lady, so he was hesitant to reach out) Another week passed and he finally asked me out, unfortunately my friend Rachel was coming up that weekend and then my parents decided to surprise my brother and I by coming up to visit, so we postponed it for another week.

         That weekend passed and at the start of the following week he asked if we could meet up before the date, feeling uncomfortable going on a date with someone he had never met before. I think that's when I gave him my last name so he could Facebook stalk me. He was free before Wednesday and I was free after Wednesday. I was going to school and working and my free time was Friday through Sunday. He insisted that he was busy later in the week though so I decided to squeeze him in between devotional, visiting teaching and work on Tuesday.

         We ended up taking a walk to the apple orchards since he didn't know where they were (funny story, his one class that semester was in the Ricks building....anyone who went to BYUI knows the orchard is RIGHT NEXT TO THE RICKS. In his defense it was a night class and hard to see...but still I laugh every time) So I went to devotional and then was headed to go visiting teaching after that. Normally when visiting teaching, I love to chat for hours on end (if you have ever visit taught me you'll know this to be true) but this time I was going to hang out with a cute guy, so I was dying to leave. Naturally the girl I was companions with loved to talk and so did the girl we were visiting (seriously no fault to them, they are both sweethearts) I was just impatient. It still took at least an hour and I booked it out of there as soon as I could.

         I got to my apartment and Garett was waiting on the couch talking to my roommate. We headed out for our walk towards the apple orchards. I don't remember much of the conversation. He talked about wanting to do a PhD and I think he mentioned he had a lot of sisters. I think I talked about photography and some about my family. Honestly I just remember it being very easy going and that the conversation flowed naturally.

        Garett knew I didn't have much time so he was expecting a 10 minute walk. Apparently after about 10 minutes he asked what I wanted to do, trying to give me an out if I needed to leave, but instead I said we could keep walking. We walked for an hour and a half, right up until I had to leave for work. He was impressed that I didn't mind taking such a long walk, despite being so busy. (Is anyone waiting on our first date still? Almost there I promise)

        I went on to work and came home and then if I remember right, I invited him over to watch Chuck. So he came over that night, then for lunch the next day, and then that evening and the next day as well. Finally it was Friday, our date!

        He was taking me to a haunted straw maze, which I'm not sure if I knew that beforehand....either way I hate haunted things, and I found out on that date that I do not like wandering around, feeling lost, trying to get out of a maze.....To add to the fun of that date, we kept running into my supervisor from work. Have you ever had that one supervisor you just loathe? They are just so obnoxious and rude and you really pray you never see them outside of work? Well that was THAT supervisor for me. So I was not only wandering around a haunted straw maze, scared people were going to jump out at me or chase me, but to add to the fun, I kept running into that supervisor. Garett was rocking this first date....

        Somehow despite that date, we still went on another date the next day and by Sunday we had decided that we didn't want to date anyone else. I found out later on that I was going to be his last date either way. After dating around for a month, he was burned out (if you don't know, Garett is very much an introvert) and that was probably exhausting for him. So it worked out that we ended up dating.

       It's fun to look back and laugh at what probably should have been nothing, because it truly was a terrible first date, but now over 5 years of marriage, 2 bachelors degrees, 2 kids, the start of a masters degree and having lived in 3 different states, we're still learning and growing together.

       It all started with me seeing a cute guy through a window and a terrible first date, but that is our story, I hope you enjoyed it.

-Meg

A Day In My Life

I'm not totally sure how this post is going to come out, but we shall see.

I feel like when we meet new people they ask what Garett does and then what I do during the day....hahahahaha what do I not do?

I wake up almost every morning to a sweet toddler alarm coming from under his door saying "HELLLLLLOOOOO! HEEEELLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOO!"

It's adorable and surprisingly loud.

We curl up on the couch drinking our Breakfast Essentials and watching Curious George or Daniel
Tiger.

At some point we get dressed and ready for the day.

My schedule shifts between lots of different things for the rest of the day. My days consist of:

• Changing diapers
• Picking up toys, trash, clothes and other random items
• Doing dishes, not before avoiding doing dishes for as long as possible (they are the chore that NEVER GOES AWAY)
• Mopping
• Trying to figure out where that smell is coming from
• Vacuuming
• More picking things up
• Telling Joshua to get out of the fridge

• Spot-shotting something (I have never vacuumed or used spot-shot so much in my life since living with a toddler) Do they make spot-shot containers by the gallon? But seriously...
• Random comments to my toddler about things he should or should not be doing and trying to avoid either him or me crying
• Talking to said toddler about things going bye bye, eating food, mommy's baby in her belly, dada at work and other new phrases
• Making lunch and hoping my toddler will eat it

• Forgetting to eat because I'm so focused on feeding my toddler, or eating whatever he doesn't
• Eating things off the floor or that were spit into my hand, because I don't feel like walking to the trash can again
• Talking to my momma
• Taking Joshua outside
• Which often leads to ending up at our neighbors' house
• Very few chores get done on days we go outside
• Trying to keep toddlers from fighting
• Apologizing a lot when toddlers do fight

• Nonstop comments to my toddler about staying safe and out of trouble
• At some point trying to slow things down and maybe watch a quiet show before nap time
• Put toddler down for a nap
• Once down I contemplate chores, sometimes they get done, sometimes I sit in silence for an hour just because. Or I fall asleep
• Garett gets home part way through nap time
• Catch up with my awesome husband on how our days went
• Joshua wakes up from nap

• Get dinner ready at the very least for Joshua, mostly it consists of leftovers or something small
• Cooking is less appealing when husband doesn't need to take a lunch for work 
• At some point I remember I'm pregnant because baby girl kicks me a bunch
• Attempt to watch some show on tv and probably miss half of it
• Try to muster up any energy to be productive (it mostly fails)
• Think about how the house looks like a disaster even though I have cleaned it about a dozen times (thank you toddler)
• Insert random days of bills and other random tasks that need to get done, for the last few months filling out stuff for grad school, now searching for housing and thinking about all the student debt we're going into
• Freaking out about the future
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Trying to get Joshua to settle down before bed with a little show

• Some days are set aside for trying to wrap my brain around all the stressful things I need to do before we move and baby is born
• Oh and during most of these cleaning tasks my toddler is somewhere else undoing my hard work
• But I keep trying for my sanity's sake
• Change another diaper
• Debate who should put Joshua to bed
• Make sure his room is ready for bed
• Ask Joshua who he wants to put him to bed (it's mostly dada and mommy chuckles in approval)
• Some days laundry gets done
• Weekly we go to the store and try not to forget anything
• Joshua goes to bed
• I veg out on the couch feeling dead

• Try to remember to pay attention when the weather comes on, forget about half the time
• Sometimes watch a show with husband, other times quietly play games on my phone while listening to the tv and trying to relax before bed
• Get ready for bed
• Pass out
• Start over

It seems like even on days where I don't have much to do, I still feel tired. I forget that emotional exhaustion is still a thing. Even on days where I'm not running around, I'm still thinking about a million things. I guess that is the life of being a wife, mom, sister, daughter and friend.

Am I tired all the time? Yes! 

Has my standard of gross drastically changed in the last year? Yes!

Would I change a thing? Absolutely not!

I feel like the months keep flying by with these days that often feel monotonous, but then I see how much Joshua is learning and growing and how we've grown as a family and it makes me smile. Being a mom is so exhausting, add being pregnant and planning to move across the country and it's amazing I have any sanity left at all, but it all works out. The funny thing is, I made this list and I could still add at least another 50 things to it, but then even I might get a little crazy. 

Life is messy and mostly chaotic with a small semblance of goals and growth. I guess I wrote this to remind myself that it is okay to be tired, I don't have to have it together all the time or even most of the time. I do need to remember to take a break sometimes and appreciate how far we've come and all the great things in store for us. 

This is to all the moms out there. You are awesome. You do a lot. Give yourself a break! Life flies by and we look back and have no clue what we've done all year, but that's okay. Life isn't always measured by big grandeur things, sometimes it's the small daily things that hold us all together. 

Thanks for being awesome friends!

-Megan

And We're Having A.....

Girl!

Joshua is going to have a baby sister!

We could not be more thrilled to have this rolly-polly baby girl join our family.

I am particularly thrilled to be able to go crazy shopping for baby girl clothing (as if I haven't been eyeing all those adorable dresses for the last few years).

Sorry the profile is rough. She would not stop moving the entire time, which made the ultrasound rather difficult, but we are happy to have such a lively, squirmy little girl.

Thank you for all the love ans support!

-Megan

Our Newest Party Member is Arriving September 2017

We are pleased to announce that our family will be expanding early September this year.

This baby has already been quite a bit of trouble since we found out.

We went for our first doctor's appointment yesterday to find out we were a bit further along than we thought.

Our due date still isn't perfect after a slightly better ultrasound today, but somewhere around the beginning of September this baby should make its appearance. 

We were bumped up about 2 1/2 weeks sooner than we thought which was a nice, if but a shocking surprise.

We did an ultrasound yesterday after my midwife said that my uterus felt bigger than the timeline we were looking at. The ultrasound showed a sweet baby with arms, legs, fingers and toes and we were expecting more along the lines of a bean.

Either way we couldn't be more thrilled to be expanding our family and making Joshua a big brother.

-Megan 

Motherhood is Crazy

                I’ve recently had this discussion with some friends. Motherhood by all accounts is irrational. Now before you have a meltdown, hear me out. Motherhood is wonderful, but crazy.

                Let’s start with pregnancy. Now maybe you are one of those people that loves being pregnant and doesn’t have very many symptoms and feels their very best. Good for you. I am not one of those people. I actually hate being pregnant. I feel miserable and uncomfortable for most of it and I don’t like any of it. That being said, I still want more kids. Why? Because motherhood is crazy.

                If you are anything like me, first you have morning sickness. One wrong move and you are going to die. You live off of peanut butter and crackers for 2-3 months or what doesn’t sound gosh awful and turn your insides out. Food aversions are real and terrible. I had to replace all my air fresheners with Joshua because one day they started making me gag. Food commercials made me sick, too much movement made me sick. Basically everything made me sick.

                I got past morning the sickness and then no one could tell I was pregnant and I was going crazy. Anyone who knows me knows before having a kid I could not gain weight. So for me I thought I was huge and everyone else was like “You look normal”. I was a bit insulted, looking back it was probably hard to tell, but for me I was the biggest I had ever been and was frustrated that no one else saw it.

                Then you hit 3^rd trimester and you feel like a balloon. How I describe it to people is that it feels like you overate, but all the time and that feeling never goes away for 3 months. That sick overfull, you’re going to burst at any second feeling. People kept telling me I was never going to sleep again after the baby was born, but I was waking up to turn over and to pee every 2 hours. At least when Joshua was born he slept for 3 hours at a time.

Finally you get to go into labor. Woohoo! Maybe you have a high pain tolerance and birth was a breeze, but I think the general consensus is that labor is hard, hence the term LABOR. I had back labor for 16 hours before I had an epidural (those are the most glorious things ever!) got to pushing, pushed and then ended up with a c-section. That recovery is a pain fyi. When my epidural finally started to wear off and medication was switched to pills, I felt it. I felt all the aching and pain of everything I had gone through in the last 24 hours and it was rather unpleasant.

They send you home with this tiny little person, entrusting you’ll keep it alive and take care of it more or less for the rest of its life. You’ll be tired for at least the next 20 years, with worrying and stress. Not to mention potty training, having to teach them basic things like talking, walking and manners. You’ll have semi-frequent meltdowns on days where they just seem to be crazy for no reason and you feel helpless. Motherhood is irrational.

You give up your figure, your energy, your money, and sometimes your dreams, all for these little people that won’t even be grateful until they have their own kids in 25+ years. You will give up everything for these kids, and yet you would do it all again in a heartbeat, because when you look at those children, your heart melts. You love them so completely so powerfully that you would do anything for them. They are your entire world and your love for them is beyond compare. Motherhood is hard, it is really hard (and I am only 2 years into it) but there is not a day that goes by that I am not grateful for my little boy. I would not trade all the stress and worry, the messes, the fighting, the cuddles, the laughter or the joy for anything. What else in our lives is so completely crazy and hard and exhausting, and yet you would never ever give up? Maybe you have a job like that, but at least you can have a life outside of it. Motherhood (and fatherhood) is all encompassing. There is no downtime, there are no vacation days. It is full time insanity, that is the most beautiful and rewarding thing.

                There are moments when I think about how much easier my life would be without my son. I’m young and married, so Garett and I could probably travel more and do fun things, but none of it can compare with what I have. I forget how young I am because I had my son at 22, but I would never give him up. He is my greatest stress and my greatest love.

                It breaks my heart at times to look at my generation which seems to despise and discourage motherhood. I’m not saying having a career is bad, and I understand motherhood may not be for everyone, but if only they knew the love and beauty of motherhood. I had absolutely no clue how much I could love until I had my son. Do not get me wrong, I love my husband and he is my best friend, but my love for Joshua is different. You cannot compare the two. Motherly love is so unique and personal. It is something all its own, it is not rational, but it is perfect. I cannot put into words my love for Joshua, but it is something every mother can understand. That look when they smile at you or give you a hug, those little tender moments that make all the pain, heartache and exhaustion completely worth it.

                Thank you to all the mothers (and fathers) out there who work so hard for their children. We can never repay our parents for all that they do for us, but I like to think we can pass it on to our future children. I never knew how much my parents loved me until I held my own son in my arms for the first time. I am grateful for their irrational love and patience with me. They did their best in hopes that one day I would turn out to be a decent kind person (I hope I can make y’all proud). I hope one day in turn I can do the same for my children.

Let us all remember on those days where we are crying and wanting to give up, that it really is worth it. My parents get to be grandparents, and I’m not going to lie, it looks good on them. Not that I am rushing time, but seeing the joy that they have from a wonderful family full of kids, spouses and grandkids, that seems to be the dream. The dream that we all can look forward to saying that we lived full lives and now we get to watch it continue with future generations.

I love where I am in my life and I look forward to all the insanity and joy my family will bring to me throughout the years. This is for all you parents and soon to be parents, remember that this is all worth it in the end. I promise that you are doing better than you think you are. So hold your children a little bit tighter and a little longer. Let the dishes wait, forgive yourself and enjoy the little moments. They are fleeting, but they are powerful.

I love you all!

-Megan