Why did you leave me here alone?
Wait, don't go so fast
I'm missing the moments as they pass.
Okay I don't really feel that way, sort of. Time does seem to speed up though. I think this post has been a long time in the making. Partially thanks to all my little brother's inspiring posts, but also a conversation I had with my mom today.
It's amazing how much I have changed and everyone around me. Seems not that long ago my siblings and I were all at home playing the game cube, or running around outside or making forts in that little triangle area in the foyer, not realizing what was in store for us. I'm pretty sure the last 3 or 4 years have been the fastest.
Since then 3 of us have gone to college, one is on his way very soon (Congrats Aaron, I'm so proud of you!). 2 have finished college, 3 marriages, a mission and 1 1/2 children later. Not to mention my parents moved across the country to an unfamiliar region. And now Catherine and Jesse are moving to Michigan. =[ (I would talk on this longer, but I hate thinking about it. Just FYI Catherine don't feel guilty. I know that Jesse needs to go to law school and this is good for both of you, but I'm going to miss you insanely).
Needless to say, it has all flown by because so much has happened and that tends to make time speed up.
I love it, but sometimes I wish we could slow it down a little. You know, stop and smell the roses (if there were any living roses in Rexburg at the moment...)
I started out as a girl who loved musicals, dancing, singing and bunnies, always so shy. I grew up to be a little less shy, making lasting friendships. Was a little rebellious in high school as all teenagers are. Mostly in refusing to sleep at reasonable hours. Honestly I was punishing myself, but also I had homework anxiety. I hated doing homework when people were around, not sure why but I did. Came to college pretty much did everything fun my first two semesters and then settled down when I met Garett. Once again I have been making some amazing friendships, though none greater than Garett of course.
He really does complete me. =]
(Ok side rant) My biggest pet peeve lately is that in books and movies a lot of the time they make it seem like marriage is boring and that married people just fight all the time and are whiny. When they're dating it's all cute and sweet and then they get married and suddenly they're boring.
IT IS A BIG FAT LIE!!!!
Garett and I honestly probably have more fun now that we're married. We're SOOO goofy together.
We dance around in the kitchen, he's always running up & hugging me, sometimes scaring me.
We're just constantly silly and ridiculous and I hate that society today portrays marriage as boring. If your marriage is boring, you're doing something wrong. Yes it is a lot of work, living with someone is never going to be easy, you'll have up days and down days, but if you don't have fun and goof off then you're going to be miserable, just like when you're single. When you're single and on your own life can get overwhelming with school, work, dating and chores so you have to remember to kick back and laugh sometimes. Same goes for marriage.
Anywhooo, sorry this has been bothering me lately. So all those who are thinking about marriage, just letting you know, it is WAY more fun to be married because then you get to be goofy ALL the time and it's tons of fun. I probably have laughed more in the last 9 months than I have in my entire life, but I also married someone who is just really funny (to me). So when thinking about marriage I would recommend thinking about how much you can laugh together, unless you hate laughing, then disregard this whole thing. Anyway for all those who are married I hope you can relate and that I'm not way off target here. I hope I haven't offended you either because maybe Garett and I just laugh more than most people, I don't know. This is just my opinion, don't hate me. I just really like to laugh.
And even just in the last 9 months we have changed a great deal. Planning a wedding, going to school and working was not easy. Honestly I was stressed most of the time. But it taught me I could handle the workload. Even now I'm still learning and changing. Fridays are now catch up on homework and house cleaning days. Balancing Garett-Megan time along with the other 50 million tasks we have on a daily basis isn't easy but we're growing together. If you asked me 2 years ago where I thought I would be, it definitely wouldn't be here. And looking back I wasn't ready then. Over the years we have a vast amount of self discovery. We learn what we like, what we hate, what we thrive for, what we need and what we want.
I thought I was going to marry a brunette dog lover, I got a blonde cat lover. In my desire to make him love dogs, I've actually come to be okay with cats. I used to think I was weaker than I was. I didn't think I could handle a job I hated while going to school full time. I didn't think I could handle living in a frozen tundra but I do. Throughout our lives we are learning more about ourselves and where we want to be in our lives.
I love my life, I won't lie. It isn't perfect. I get stressed easily, I worry like crazy and I constantly have a running list of things to do in my head. But I know I'm where I belong and though I worry I can't handle such a tough schedule, I know I can. 2 years ago I could not have handled this, but I can now. Slowly life has been preparing me for this. And though I'm a little terrified to have kids, I know when the time comes I will be ready. (I promise I am NOT pregnant, not ready for it). Not so much of being scared of being a mother, but scared of being a student mother. I know some people can do it and hats off to them but as far as I know, I'm not one of them. Regardless when I'm ready, I'm ready but for now I'm just working on myself and my marriage. It's a journey for sure, even though mine is just beginning, I love it.
At the end of the day I know I'm where I'm supposed to be. Where I'll be in 2 years, I have no clue, but it'll be right wherever I go. Life is crazy and scary, but that is the beauty of it. If there is one thing you can be certain of in life, it is change (also death, taxes, and dishes) and with it learning in growth.
I know I have a long ways to go, I'm scared and excited but I'll be ready for it.
I hope we can all remember to embrace change no matter what form it comes in.
Love you all.
Thanks for listening. Sorry it was long.
Megan
